When retirement chooses you — the quiet reality of involuntary retirement

When we talk about retirement, we often talk about choice. People imagine it as a milestone they’ve worked toward — something they plan, prepare for, maybe even count down to. A finish line they cross proudly, with a party, a toast, and a new chapter waiting just on the other side.

But for many people, that’s not the story.

Retirement doesn’t always come with a sense of freedom or excitement. Sometimes, it comes with a redundancy notice. Or a shrinking job market. Or a quiet understanding between employer and employee that, while no one says the word out loud, this is the end of the road.

Over the past few years, especially since the pandemic, I’ve come across story after story of people who didn’t retire by choice. And once I started noticing this theme, I couldn’t unsee it. I’ve spoken to people in their 60s who were laid off with a handshake and a payout, told they could “enjoy retirement” even if they hadn’t asked for it. Others were made redundant in their early 60s and quietly realized that, between ageism and a competitive job market, they may never find another job. Some are still looking. Some have stopped trying.

One friend — someone thoughtful, sharp, and deeply mission-driven — was let go during the pandemic. He was financially prepared but emotionally completely unprepared. He’d loved his work. He thrived on goal-setting and problem-solving. He didn’t want to stop. But the decision was made for him. In the years since, he’s explored different hobbies, tried a few volunteer gigs, travelled a bit — but he still doesn’t feel settled. He told me recently, “I just don’t know what my mission is anymore. I miss having a reason to get up and focus on something that matters.”

Another acquaintance shared that he was “technically retired,” but didn’t feel like a retiree. “I never made that decision,” he said. “I just stopped getting job offers.” And when friends ask him about retirement, he finds himself brushing off the question. It wasn’t something he chose. It was something that happened to him.

This theme came up again when my friend’s mum told me that several of her friends had been let go from their roles a couple of years before they planned to retire. They’d been with their companies for decades. They weren’t devastated financially — most received severance packages or had pensions in place. But emotionally, they were gutted. They never got to say, “I’m ready.” They never got a send-off or a celebration. It was just one day: employed. The next: not.

They’ve found it difficult to explain to friends and family. Saying “I retired” feels untrue. Saying “I was laid off” feels awkward. So they just... avoid the topic.

This kind of quiet, involuntary retirement is far more common than people realize. And yet, it’s rarely talked about. We don’t have language for it. There’s no roadmap. No guidebook. Most of the resources and content available assume you chose this transition — that you’ve had time to prepare mentally, socially, and emotionally. But for a huge number of people, retirement arrives unannounced.

And when that happens, the adjustment is harder.

There’s often a gap — a sense of unfinished business, a feeling of being unmoored. People feel caught between identities: not a worker, not quite a retiree. They’re asked to embrace freedom, but feel like they’ve lost control.

So what do you do when retirement chooses you?

There’s no single answer. But what’s clear is that support is needed — not just financial guidance, but emotional and psychological tools to navigate a transition that wasn’t asked for. People need space to reflect. To reframe. To grieve what was lost and slowly discover what comes next.

At LivOn, we’re building our platform with this in mind. Because not everyone reaches retirement through a carefully plotted route. Some people arrive dazed, confused, even resentful. And that’s okay. We believe everyone deserves the chance to reorient themselves, to reconnect with their values, and to redefine what this stage of life can be.

Whether retirement came with a countdown or caught you by surprise, it doesn’t have to define the rest of your story. There’s still time to ask, “What now?” And there’s still power in choosing what happens next.

We’ll be writing more about this, and we’d love to hear from you if this resonates. You’re not alone. And you’re not behind. This chapter is still yours to shape.